If you’re a writer, you’d better be prepared. If anyone ever issues a search warrant for your home, that little notepad next to your night table is bound to get you 25-life! That’s right. They’ll be convinced you’re a serial killer!
As you keep notes on how to murder someone, poison a close friend, pistol whip a total stranger into submission, or deliver an envelope ripe with anthrax, you are just asking for legal trouble. But you’re doing exactly as you should as a writer. Yes, a dilemma of monumental proportions!
You learned early on that you should always keep a small notebook and pencil next to your bed so that when you wake up at 3 am with a brilliant idea preventing sleep, you should write it down immediately, because come morning, the idea will go poof! along with your dreams. Gone. Stellar plot. Gone. Ideal serial killer motive. Also gone.
And yet, if you are raptured in your sleep, those left behind and reading your notes will no doubt be convinced you aren’t waiting for them in heaven.
Page One: Poison Aunt Louise. Slip belladonna in her tea. The old hag deserves it.
Page Two: The overbearing boss has to go. A small adjustment to his brakes should do the job.
Page Three: Pose as crossing guard. Kidnap the cute little girl with the pink backpack who lives down the street. No one will guess.
Page Four: Wife has nagged one time too many. Send her out with the weekly garbage.
You get the drift. The notes will no doubt require a lawyer if anyone but you sees them. Hopefully you’ve let your spouse in on Page Four so there won’t be any misunderstandings.
No search warrants wanted in this house.
You have no idea what I’m hiding in my little notebook!